Central Asian Culture Doesn't Work in Minnesota

It may seem obvious, but part of a global worker's overseas career is a "home assignment" usually every 4-5 years.  This means there is a lot of transition!  And part of transition as a global worker is to transition to a new (old) passport country, a new computer (usually each term), a new home, new clothes, a different grocery store and way of shopping (American vegetables are simply awful), and also.....remember the culture!  But after almost 2 decades of living in a conservative, war-torn, Muslim, Shame-Honor culture, I forgot about the culture.

Let's face it.  Minnesota culture - "Minnesota Nice" ...is its own brand of nice.
Passive-Aggressive-Nice as the book says.  But friendly-home-to-us-but-just-sort-of, because we have begun to recognize we are no longer the same Minnesotans, the same people who idealistically went overseas as new young parents/newlyweds back in 2000.

We've changed, and this time coming "home," I've continually been reminded of how I have changed and how the Minnesota culture hasn't. The amazing thing is that God's-Holy-Spirit-infused-remnant who "get it" are here, too.  It's like a little oasis in time and space when I interact with believers who have a global perspective and can see their own culture with more objectivity than others.

So, in all the frustration I was having with one particular group of supporters (aka one of our partnering churches), I thankfully have developed the dysfunctional reflex of "what is wrong with me" and discovered that this time it was a good response to have - I discovered I was operating in a Central Asian/Shame and Honor culture and they weren't.  When I adapted, things went so much more smoothly.  It left me feeling lonely and longing for life overseas, but at least plans were moving forward in a much more positive direction on the calendar and in my heart.

So remember your global workers have to leave one entirely different culture and transition back to their passport culture, and give them space, time, and grace.  Let them be a little "messy" as they work through transition.  Transition by definition includes loss and change on a scale which people who never leave in the same way can understand. Grace needs to go both ways in understanding each other. No, I no longer love everything about America - there are so many things I miss about life in the Middle East, including my high quality mop! But I'll almost never say no to some good Ben & Jerry's New York Super Chunk Fudge icecream!

I've also been grateful to see a spark of love develop in my heart for my adopted "hometown" that we just settled into.  They have a great deal of pride in their old "motherland" here and have a harvest parade every fall, even pronouncing the parade in the mother tongue correctly. It's rare to see a town take such pride, but it's kinda nice being on the outside of a small town and seeing how everyone knows everyone.

Most of my married life has been overseas in Muslim cultures, moving 20 times in 18 years of marriage with 5 years of living homelessly before marriage.  So its kinda strange to see up close, in a language I fully understand, people living in one place their entire life, and I begin to get a glimpse of how they see (and don't see) the rest of the world. There's a lot to learn here, including how I've changed, which I'm just beginning to discover.