Faith Under Fire

One Sunday in 2017, Neal and I each gave the same sermon title, "Faith Under Fire."  The sermon was based on Exodus 17: 7-16.

We spoke at different venues on the same morning, and if you'd like to hear the differences between our teaching style, listen to both sermons here! :)

• Anna's Teaching "Faith Under Fire"

• Neal's Teaching "Faith Under Fire"

• Faith Under Fire Power Point

Unhelpful Things People Say in Risk #7

This series is based on real statements actually heard in risk situations.

#7 "This Too Shall Pass."

A worker is sharing a risk situation with a veteran on the field or supporter back home, not knowing what to do, and receives this response, "This too shall pass." Being on the receiving end of this statement, a "tape" of synonymous thoughts implied by this statement begin playing in my head:

• "I'm making too big of a deal about the risk, threat, danger - whatever it is that is causing my anxiety.
• "I'm being weak, not strong like the other person, because clearly that threat isn't bothering them.
• "I'm reading the situation wrong"
• "I would know this if I had been here as long as him/her.

I've always found Daniel 4:3 to be so inspiring and calming - God's Kingdom will go on forever and ever. It helps me to keep my eyes up to know that one day, all will be made right.  But it still doesn't answer the urgent question, the urgent demand, of knowing what to do TODAY.

There are no guarantees that "it shall pass," so it seems a bit condescending and arrogant to suggest that one knows this.

As with all the previous unhelpful statements discussed, a worker needs help in discernment and decision making when they share.  Giving a trite statement like this is really self-serving for the individual saying it, and is slothfulness of soul because there is an unwillingness to really help the worker sort through what is the risks, dangers, threats.

Let's be the spiritual mothers and fathers needed by all those serving in dangerous places and graciously and humbly help those trying to work out what it means to persevere in hard situations.


Go To:
Unhelpful Things People Say in Risk #6

Sloth In The Soul

"There is an evil which most of us condone and are even guilty of: indifference to evil. We remain neutral, impartial, and not easily moved by the wrongs done to other people. Indifference to evil is more insidious than evil itself; it is more universal, more contagious, more dangerous. A silent justification, it makes possible an evil erupting as an exception becoming the rule and being in turn accepted."(1)

"Patience, a quality of holiness, may be sloth in the soul when associated with a lack of righteous indignation."(2)

Ecclesiastes 3:1, 7, 8 states, "For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: ...a time to keep silence and a time to speak, a time to love, and a time to hate."

The Oxford Dictionary defines "Sloth" as "Reluctance to work or make an effort; laziness."

One saint defined sloth as this:
 "sluggishness of soul or boredom because of the exertion necessary for the performance of a good work. The good work may be a corporal task, such as walking; or a mental exercise, such as writing; or a spiritual duty, such as prayer."(3)

"Man's sense of injustice is a poor analogy to God's sense of injustice. The exploitation of the poor is to us a misdemeanor, to God, it is a disaster Our reaction is disapproval; God's reaction is something no language can convey." (4) 

In other words, maturity and deep discernment in Christ results in righteous anger and just action in the face of evil, not patience and apathy. The opposite of sloth is passion of the soul that feels what God feels. It takes work to sift through our emotions and it is uncomfortable to examine our own souls. Are we being slothful of soul in the face of evil?

We live in a time when more clearly than ever wherever terrorists strike, there is a parallel movement of the Spirit happening. Reading the news with spiritual eyes takes a combination of research and hunting - we need to sign up for missionary prayer letters and search the private blogs to learn what God is doing all over the world. 

There were two terror attacks in downtown London in 2 weeks time. After the 2nd one, I kept asking myself - what is going on in London that this happened? After doing very little research on Google, I quickly was reminded that London is the base for the largest seminary training of Iranian pastors.  These terrorist attacks around the world seem random and coincidental, but actually mirror the reality of the spiritual war between God and His enemy. 

Are our hearts broken by the suffering of the Yazidi people?  While we need to pray and work to stop terrorism, and evil doers need to caught and jailed, at the same time we also know of ISIS soldiers coming to Christ.  I hear of pagans taking in refugees and helping them make a new life. Are Christians taking in Muslim refugees to help them? What about the Ethiopian Christians being placed in horrible concentration camps - this news goes unreported in the main media. I wonder sometimes, are we, the modern day church so racist that we just don't pay attention to what happens to our black brothers and sisters? 

Lord have mercy on them. Lord, have mercy on us.  

The way to break the sin cycle of slothfulness of soul, of indifference and apathy is to repent and ask for God's help.  We are to love others as we love ourselves.  Sloth is pure selfishness and self-idolatry.  This is why we need to repent. Then we need to regularly read and hear stories and cultivate awareness of what horrors others are experiencing and what God is doing to demonstrate His faithfulness in our day.  The opposite of slothfulness is work, and this includes the work we need to do in our souls to feel what God feels, to see what God sees (Divine seeing),  to be angry in the way God is angry, and to love passionately all those He loves.

Praying through the news helps us to empathize with those suffering and we begin to cultivate a Divine perspective on the human situation around the world.  Slothfulness of soul is a particularly American Church sin.  We are an adolescent church that doesn't know what it is to suffer or risk our lives to the point of death.  

The problems the American church argues over are 1st world church problems, issues that we do not have the luxury of discussing when we are in a "fox hole" engaging in the front-line battle for the souls of men, women, boys and girls. 

I plead with our generation to engage in the cosmic battle and become alert to the battle in our souls and for our souls. Slothfulness is a highly effective strategy of the enemy to blind us to what is truly happening in the world.  May we become God's voice, hands and feet to minister to all those who have no voice to cry out against the evils being done to them. May we have holy unrest because of all those who still have yet to hear. 

Resources Cited: 
(1, 2, 4) Abraham Heschel - The Prophets
(3) - The Three Ages of the Interior Life

Theology of Failure

Perhaps aging develops a more pragmatic attitude towards failure, or perhaps simple the sheer guts to persevere in overseas ministry for more than 23 years and experience deep failure and mountain top successes have given me the ability to embrace failure a little easier.

I'd like to hope that my life exemplifies the old adage "What doesn't kill me makes me stronger" (and wiser).

I was startled by this idea of a God-sanctioned Theology Failure in a teaching by Kenneth Bailey.  He stated that Jesus gave his disciples a "theology of failure" when he sent them out in Mark 6:6-13.

Here is what Kenneth Bailey has to say,

He essentially tells them: If you are welcomed into any home - well and good - fulfill your ministry while based in that place and don't move about looking for more comfortable lodgings. If they do not receive you, shake off the dust "under the feet." This refers to the dust stirred up by your feet that permeates your clothing. Shaking it off is a symbolic gesture that means "I am finished with you and am leaving. Furthermore, as I leave, I take nothing from this house, not even its dust" (Acts 13:51, 18:6). This dramatic gesture can help the apostles leave behind them any lingering sense of failure. It frees them to go on (like Paul and his band) to the next home or village "filled with joy and the Holy Spirit" (Acts 13:52). Having tried and failed, they must move on. It is astounding to see Jesus on this very first outreach beyond the range of his voice offering advice on how to deal with failure. This extraordinary exit strategy is in harmony with his entry strategy - to go on need, not in power and conquering or with aid to ensure a welcome. 

What an astonishing and equipping idea - to equip the newest generation of global workers with the idea of a theology of failure. What a freeing idea! 

You mean it's not all up to me? 

I can be sent into a high-risk, abrasive and war-torn culture where I don't know the language very well, where the Mullah's preach against foreigners on a weekly basis, where stones are thrown at me, where the people (my neighbors) don't like me simply because I'm American, (or Western, or educated, or a Christian) and I can accept that some will accept me (and Christ) and some will despise me (and Christ)? 

How much better would our folks thrive on the field if they embraced this teaching of Jesus! Would that His Body affirms His people for faithfulness not apparent success driven by numbers.

He does.

No Need for a Faith Crisis

She sat in the far back, closest to the door as if ready to bolt when it was over, but I could tell she was  listening intently. Immediately after we were finished giving the presentation on our past five years living in the Middle East and ministering across Central Asia, I went up and introduced myself to her before she could leave and asked her how she knew about the local meeting with our partners (last month). She began to share about the first time she heard me teach from John's Gospel and how she's read our newsletters for years.

When I asked what church she is a member of, tears welled up in her eyes as she explained she'd been in a faith crisis for so long because of church and just hasn't been able to attend church much in the last year. "They are all too perfect" she explained. "They talk about how they hear from God, they wear beautiful clothes, their lives look so perfect. My life isn't like that. Thank you for sharing what is hard for you, what didn't go well for you and Neal overseas," she added.

We receive this response frequently after one of our presentations or teachings.  Neal and I make it a point to share what is hard for us, where we struggled, and how God has helped us, and so far, it's never "back fired" on us.  To the contrary, it seems to minister more to people when we share our failures, our losses, what disappointments we've had. They are attracted to vulnerability and authenticity, especially from public leaders.

In a cross-cultural ministry setting, we global workers often go into crisis over wrong expectations of God and of other Christ-followers who don't behave the way we expect them to behave. In the same way, there seems to be a pervasive crisis among American Christ followers over how the American church is behaving.   I let her know she is not alone, that there are clear reasons for why the Church is the way she is in America, why so many are in crisis, and that there is a path out of it.

One step on the path is to realize that in every generation there is always a remnant of His followers who understand, who have a depth and an intimacy that is uncommon among the majority. This godly remnant has always been dissatisfied with the status quo.

Since returning to the USA for our 1-year home assignment, we've been amazed at how many of our friends and acquaintances are disenfranchised over Sunday morning church and are looking for a more authentic, deeper relational experience with God and with others. They don't appreciate Sunday morning entertainment and emotional manipulation.

We also hear from global workers who crave to experience a deeper relationship with Him, and respond well to being challenged and by elders who share and teach authentically. God is clearly doing something around the world to woo His people to want more, crave more of Him, but there are too few guides to show the way.

I encouraged her to consider choosing to step off the path of a faith crisis, recognize that there are clear reasons why the American church in her present state is not able to meet her needs and to find the authentic remnant who can help journey with her.  I love meeting with people like her who are hungry for more, who recognize that there is so much more to the Christian life than what is currently on offer.   

My prayer for my heart and for the hearts of my children and for all those like my friend-in-crisis is that we will grow in our unconditional love for His Bride, in whatever culture and nation she is found, and winsomly demonstrate a different path for all those wanting to know more of Him and grow deeper in intimacy with our Heavenly Father. 

Psalm 62 - Audio Teaching: Cultivating Silence and Becoming Unshaken

Recently, I taught on Psalm 62 in Cappadocia at a ladies retreat. These two audio recordings are now available on the Bible Teaching page. 

Listening for God when surrounded by Overwhelming Need and Uncertainty

"Jesus Christ is alive and here to teach his people himself.
His voice is not hard to hear; his vocabulary is not difficult to understand. But learning to listen well and to hear correctly is no
small task."
Richard Foster, Sanctuary of the Soul

Unshaken! In the Face of Unrelenting Violence and Evil

Both of these are an internal heart posture that can be developed within us.  What happens for you as to listen for God and consider your own resiliency and steadiness during uncertain and challenging times?

Psalms 62 - Perhaps these teachings will provoke some questions you’ve not considered in awhile, perhaps unlock some place you’ve been stuck.

What you won’t hear is a simple 3-step solution, a moralistic message on what you need to do right or more of.....Sometimes, the question IS the answer – because He wants us to sit with it for awhile.

It's Still a Privilege 1994 - 2016

We didn't yet know each other, but at the same time began raising support for full-time ministry work. He was heading to Albania to fly airplanes, and I was heading to work with teenagers, leading trips all over the world. It was September, 1994 when we met at the same speaking event.

In the years that followed, we had a courtship that spanned three continents and resulted in marriage in March, 1999.

We had to evacuate Peshawar, Pakistan two days after 9/11, and ended up back in the States. While there, I gave birth to our second child, our beautiful daughter. We waited to see if we would be able to return to our home in Peshawar, with the hopes that one day we'd be able to move back to Kabul.

During that waiting, we wrote the following on Dec 10, 2001, to our supporters:

However, Neal and I want our personal world view of the work we do and our own life choices and calling to be one characterized with the mindset that it is an honor to serve Him as His children. The joy of having the opportunity to see Him work on the front lines of the "battle field for souls" far outweighs any personal sacrifices we make.  

 So few people get the opportunity to do what we do, as well as the honor to be able to live in one of the most religiously strict and needy countries of the world today. We agree with our overseas colleagues that it IS a privilege to serve the people in Central Asia, and we ask Him often that the way will be smooth for us to return in early April.

We were so thankful to arrive back in Peshawar in early May of 2002, and then return to Kabul June 1, 2002. 

Our vision hasn't changed - it is still a privilege to live and serve in the Middle East. 

Let's At Least Get the Numbers Right

Risk Analysis and Mitigation are Situational, NOT Conceptual

Recently, it was brought to my attention that several key leaders of large teams were comparing the current risk of attack in their city to the risk of being involved in a traffic accident. Statistically, looking only at the numbers, it is totally rationally true - the risks are much higher that a large percentage of the population will experience a traffic accident as opposed to being effected by a bombing attack by terrorists. 

The conclusion made by these leaders then was that the international school and international church are actually a reasonably safe "bet" to continue to be part of, with no major changes put in place. 

There are several major problems with using primarily or only statistical analysis as a measuring stick for cross-cultural risk threats. 

1. It is applying conceptual thinking to a situation incorrectly and illogically and in isolation from situational thinking. 

2. Rational statistical analysis is logical for the population not currently threatened by terrorists, but is illogical for the much smaller population being threatened. 

3. It only accounts for one cause and one consequence, and therefore is extremely biased and limited in scope.

4. It is the kind of argument that curtails discussion, because it is hard for people in risk to argue against the numbers. 

Massive amounts of secular research demonstrate that rational risk analysis is incomplete and ineffective when it does not take into account the emotional factor. Using only rational risk analysis is applying only conceptual thinking to risk analysis, and is not balanced with situational thinking. In this case, it is using the laws of probability in general (which originate from gambling statistics) to a specific known threat of attack against a specific location, which is a situational risk event.

If there are only 400 Christians, or even 4000 in a city of 6 million Muslims, and the 4000 are being threatened specifically by terrorists, then the risk of an attack is quite high and very reasonable to anticipate. Therefore, risk mitigation should take place. It is irresponsible from both a worldly (risk adverse) perspective, as well as an Isaiah 22, Matthew 25, and Luke 16 stewardship perspective. 

When comparing data sets in risk analysis, the data sets must be similar. Therefore, comparing the rate of traffic accidents to the threat of attack is illogical. It would be better to compare a similar city and situation where non-Muslims are being threatened. as well as take into account the recent (6 months to 12 months) history of threats and resulting action, and see what those terrorists have actually done. 

But to put men, women, and children at greater risk because due diligence had not been applied in risk analysis and mitigation is quite simply, irresponsible before the Lord. Often only Matthew and Luke are cited as principles of stewardship in the Bible. However, everything Jesus taught gave  deeper insight on the Tanach. One of the primary passages on stewardship in the Tanach is Isaiah 22. 

Here, Isaiah 22 makes it clear that the lazy steward of the city and people was cast out and replaced by a man who became as a father to the people in a dangerous situation. I think this is extremely instructive for us. We are to be as mothers and fathers to our flock, especially when we are in risk, paying attention to them extremely closely out of a heart to care for them. 

In risk, as leaders, we have a clear calling to not be cavalier about His resources and His people, but to do the opposite - to love and help them into endurance. When God's people endure in high risk situations, we are putting His Kingdom on display, and through that, people at the very gate of hell are led out of demonic captivity and into His eternal presence. 

Let's at least do our best to analyze the numbers coherently and use similar data sets in the numbers we choose to use in our risk analysis. 

Live Deliberately

I decided early on in my adult life that there are two quotes which would define my life, one by agnostic Henry David Thoreau, and the other by the Apostle Paul.

Thoreau wrote:

"I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately, to front only the essential facts of life, and see if I could not learn what it had to teach, and not, when I came to die, discover that I had not lived. I did not wish to live what was not life, living is so dear; nor did I wish to practise resignation, unless it was quite necessary. 

I wanted to live deep and suck out all the marrow of life, to live so sturdily and Spartan-like as to put to rout all that was not life, to cut a broad swath and shave close, to drive life into a corner, and reduce it to its lowest terms, and, if it proved to be mean, why then to get the whole and genuine meanness of it, and publish its meanness to the world; or if it were sublime, to know it by experience, and be able to give a true account of it..."  


The Apostle Paul, the greatest missionary who ever lived, wrote in Philippians 2:7: "Even if I am to be poured out as a drink offering upon the sacrificial offering of your faith, I am glad and rejoice with you all."

A drink offering is poured out, totally, without reserve, not stopping, hesitating, or looking back. It's suffering endured as a joyful, willing sacrifice, so that the other, or those for whom the sacrifice is made, will have more holy and mature faith.

This is living with a whole heart, holding nothing back. I cannot live life with only half a heart. I tried that once, and all it got me was anger and coldness, a stony heart unable to feel or breathe. I wasn't me. 

The Gospel in a person's life can do so much more than we can imagine. It can melt hearts of stone, it can pour out the fires of anger and kindle love long lost, it can transform, as in Charles Dickens, a man at the end of his life to the most-loved and generous man the town had ever seen.

I can never settle for living without infinite hope in Christ's transformation in me and in the most hopeless and worst sinner.  There is ever so much freedom in living in childish anticipation of what He can do, as well as incalcating a sensitivity to woundedness by those I hold dearest.  Callousness or indifference to another's sin, without ever calling it out, is in the end enabling and points no one to righteousness.  

Spiritual Motherhood means the trained ability to discern what is righteous and what is sin, and where is forbearance necessary? Over all that, grace poured out in abundant measure, listening closely to what Jesus' Spirit says is to be done is the only way to discern the correct path when the way ahead is obscure, foggy with differing messages, statements of pain mixed with being misunderstood, unmet expectations, and character assassination.

The road is narrow, and lonely, but living deliberately is the way of all those who want to go deeper in having a pure heart and an intimacy of relationships with others and with our Lord.